On Motherhood & Sanity

Thursday, August 30, 2012

Best and final

homeless is the natural  state for the nomad

 So, we have kind of decided (says she dragging her feet) that we are going to make New York our home.

Don’t get me wrong, it doesn’t mean that we will live here ‘until we die’ as my daughter would put it, but it does mean that we are sick and tired of renting; of living in a space that belongs to someone else; of having to ask permission to do things to that space, and living in constant fear of having anything that happens to that space cost us an arm and a leg. We do have small children after all.

We are also tired of buying furniture trying to double guess if they will fit, If they are realistic for moving around, and if they can be easily dismantled.

And so the search begun.

If you remember, one year ago today we had located our current premises and were looking for hurricane Irene not to drown our life stories,  living on blown up mattresses and at the mercy of our friends.

Sadly, not even one year later, we are on the hunt again. And even more sadly, in New York,  because the New York housing market is ruthless. ‘Best and final’ are words that keep me up at night, covered in sweat and oreo cookies. This is what they tell you when the house that in your head is slowly becoming your home, has received various bids at asking price (or above asking), and the broker wants to know, what is your best and final offer? What is the most you are willing to give to make this your home? To make sure you don’t loose it to someone else….

Which is of course  a guessing game. A tortuous, cruel and painful one.

Will a better one pop up later? Will I be relieved I waited? Will I be kicking myself for all eternity as I find nothing as beautiful in this price range?

You’d think these houses are in great condition but no, they are falling apart, to what degree, you can work out once your offer has been accepted and you get a surveyor in. Once you are allowed back in for a second look.

Some homes quickly escalate and leave your “possible” bracket, and then you can just bid them farewell. Others slowly drop off your wish list, as you realize that there are certain compromises that you cannot make (not at that price range anyways). And then there is the current home. A strange home that looks nothing like my dream one, yet…. Every time I think someone else might take it, I feel a sudden urge to throw my wallet on the table and scream:

“it’s mine! So back the hell off”

not a great position for bargaining.

….will keep you posted.

not "the" house.... not by a long shot